God's presence

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Welcome to the Saturday Examen.

As the week draws to a close, I look back over these days of prayer and let them settle into a single, quiet review.

I remember Laurence, giving away without counting the cost, and Paul's insistence that God loves a cheerful giver. Where, this week, have I given freely, and where have I noticed myself holding back?

I remember Clare's determined littleness, and the shepherd who left the ninety-nine to search for the one that strayed. Have I been able to let go of some small security this week? And have I recognized a moment of being sought by God when I myself had wandered?

I remember the hard, practical honesty of Wednesday's gospel: go and tell the one you have quarrelled with their fault, between the two of you alone. I remember the promise of Christ's presence wherever two or three are gathered in his name, even in difficult conversations. Is there a relationship that is still asking something of me in this respect?

I remember Ezekiel, told that he lived among a people with eyes to see who did not see, and asked to act out God's word at the cost of his own dignity. Where, this week, have I noticed something I would rather not have noticed?

I remember Maximilian Kolbe, whose trust in God did not remove his fear but gave him courage to face it in the darkness. I recall Isaiah's promise of joy drawn from the wells of salvation whatever the circumstances. Where, this week, have I found the kind of joy that does not depend on things going well?

I bring all of this: the giving and the holding back, the freedom to let myself be little, the insecurity, the honesty and the avoidance, the seeing and the not seeing, the trust and the fear, into God's presence. I ask for the grace to begin the week ahead a little more freely and trustingly.

Glory be to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit.

As it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be

World without end

Amen